In this standalone Treehouse of Horror special, at a carnival, Lisa listens to three extra spooky stories from a tattoo-covered circus performer. The first has Bart trying to find help for someone buried alive in the 50s, the second has Superintendent Chalmers getting a robotic replica in the retro future, and the third has Homer fighting for lowbrow entertainment in a brutalist dystopia where prestige television rules the airwaves.
The R. Bradbury's Traveling Night Circus has suddenly come to town. Homer and Bart run off to see the dog-faced man and man-faced dog, and Marge is distracted by the world's strongest boy, leaving the circus-hating Lisa to wander by herself. She comes across the illustrated man, who has just been fired for not being illustrated enough to be an attraction in the modern era, even if his tattoos are mystical portals. Lisa approaches the illustrated man, and after some hesitation from both sides, he shows her the tattoos. He says that if you stare long enough, the tattoo tells a story. Lisa stares into a tattoo on his pectoral of a boy in a coonskin cap with a gun in the woods, and a mystical wind picks up as the tail on the coonskin cap begins to move.
The story begins with a 1950s-style Bart in the woods, preparing his gun to shoot some cans. But he hears a high-pitched scream. He looks around, and he finds out the source of the scream is underground, under a recently-disturbed spot of dirt. Bart wants to help the screaming woman, but his hands aren't going to dig her out any time soon.
Bart heads to his home, but Homer and Marge aren't paying attention, they're more invested in the gossip about a fight involving Luann Van Houten, based on an accusation that she dyes her hair. Homer feels sorry for her for being married to Kirk, and he knows firsthand what a loser he is, he worked for Kirk at Double Beef Burger. Bart tries in vain to steer the conversation to be about the screaming woman, but they think it's another one of his lies, like the one about the boy and the wolf. Bart runs to his room and picks up his can-phone, hoping to get Milhouse's attention. Milhouse is at his grandma's house and will be there for a few days. He can't play "screaming woman" with Bart right now, but Bart asserts this is no game.
Bart decides to check every house in town, hoping to find which house the screaming lady belongs to by process of elimination. However, every house he comes across already has a lady in them, with a drink in one hand, a cigarette in the other, and a bun in the oven. Eventually, he finds Luann Van Houten, who asks if something is the matter. Luann hears Bart out, and she believes him and invites him inside to share more information over a glass of milk. Bart quickly downs the milk, he knows the lady is running out of time, but Luann offers another glass. Bart objects, milk makes him sleepy, but Luann pours it anyway, saying Milhouse should be home soon, he's with his hula hoop tutor. Bart points out how that doesn't align with what Milhouse told him, and Luann adds some heavy cream to Bart's milk before getting Bart to drink it all. Bart is tired, and Luann takes him to Milhouse's room for a nap before locking the door. Needing to stay awake, Bart breaks open a pixie stick, and stabs himself in the leg with it like an adrenaline shot. Energized, Bart jumps out the window.
Back in the woods, Bart gets back to the dirt patch the lady is buried under, but he hears no screaming. Bart thinks the lady is dead, and he feels remorseful, but after Bart gets his ear closer to the dirt, he hears singing. The Double Beef Burger jingle! Bart runs home to sing it to his parents, and this grabs Homer's attention. He knows who is buried there, and back at the dirt patch with Eddie, Lou, Barney and Dr. Hibbert, Homer reveals the screaming woman isn't a woman at all, it's Kirk! Chief Wiggum appears with Luann, who reveals she buried Kirk alive because he wasn't secretive enough about buying her hair dye. Chief Wiggum lets her go, because in the 1950s, divorce is much more taboo than murder. Marge says they will never doubt Bart ever again, and Bart uses this newfound trust to accuse Lisa of being a communist. Lisa is arrested while Bart, Marge and Homer have a drink.
Lisa is convinced the illustrated man's tattoos really are magic, wanting to know more about a sun tattoo on the side of his belly. That's just from a phase where he was into Sublime, and he draws her attention to a tattoo of some gears on his shoulder, and the gears start to turn, and turn into...
Superintendent Gary Chalmers' wristwatch. It's a boring meeting with Principal Seymour Skinner, planning a Flag Day celebration despite it being seven months away. Deciding he's had enough when Skinner brought up the bunting, Chalmers up and leaves. He's walks down the sidewalk of a typical retro-futuristic street, and goes into a still-contemporary bar, Moe's. Carl notices Chalmers is drinking alone, and he doesn't seem like the kind of guy who drinks alone for a good reason. Chalmers explains his problem, he constantly has to spend time with someone so life-drainingly dull. Carl looks around, gets close to Chalmers, and lets him in on a solution made possible by the latest scientific breakthrough. Carl takes Chalmers to outside Lenny's house, where Lenny and Carl are working on a jigsaw puzzle. The Carl that's inside with Lenny is a robotic replica from Marionettes Frinkorporated, full of gears, and ready to do the things the flesh-and-blood Carl wants to avoid, like jigsaw puzzles. Carl hands Chalmers a card for the company.
Time has passed and Chalmers' robot has arrived. The Chalmers robot is an immaculate replica, knowing everything the real Chalmers does. He takes it to the school, where Skinner is mulling over possible study hall colors (exclusively shades of off-white or boring). With the robot Chalmers handling the tedium, the real Chalmers gets some ice cream, but while he's out, he spots Skinner. He questions how he can be in two places at once, and a short chase ensues before they both tire out. Skinner has ordered a robot so he wouldn't have to put up with Chalmers being mean to him. A brief argument breaks out before Carl runs to them both. Their robots must be destroyed! Something went wrong in robot Carl's gears, and it started thinking for himself and started to feel emotions. Carl tried getting his robot back into his crate, but he started fighting back, leading Carl to shoot the robot with his ray gun. He hands his ray gun to Chalmers.
Chalmers and Skinner run to the school, where there's an assembly. The robots are friends now, and that means they have emotions, they're too late! The robot Skinner wants more friendships to blossom, and he encourages the students to call the administration by their first name, but Chalmers says this will be end of the social order as they know it. Skinner tackles the robot Seymour, and Chalmers wrestles the robot Gary to the ground. As the students cheer the violence, the ray gun slips out of Chalmers' pocket. Skinner grabs it, and he reduces his robot to scrap metal. He turns around to face Gary and Chalmers, but he doesn't know which one is real and which one is the robot. The students aren't much help, equal amounts encouraging Skinner to shoot one or the other, with Jimbo chiming in to tell Skinner to shoot them both. The one on the left voices his regrets, and the one on the right angrily yells at Skinner to shoot the other. Skinner bitterly figures the mean one is the real one, and shoots the one on the left... and he chose wrong! The students cheer the bloodshed, and a dying flesh-and-blood Chalmers forgives Skinner for this fatal error. The robot Gary offers to lift Skinner's spirits by looking over the bunting for the Flag Day plans, and they walk off, friends.
Lisa knows it's time to go, but the illustrated man wants her to look at one more tale. On the side of his belly, next to the hernia scar, there's a tattoo of a door.
A door is kicked open by a menacing police force bearing flamethrowers, the firemen. They have a report of subversive content in the Lovejoy home. Behind a bookshelf of dystopian fiction, Reverend Lovejoy is watching Wipeout on a TV surrounded by tapes of sitcoms, reality TV, and police procedurals; lowbrow entertainment! Reverend Lovejoy is taken in for re-education, and his contraband is set ablaze. One of the firemen lifts his mask, and it's Homer!
Back home, the family is about to indulge in a new episode of Robber Barons, but Homer is hopelessly lost by the complex characters, complex story, dark palette, and a very densely-packed Previously on… segment. Homer's mental energy is spent and the episode proper hasn't even started, but Marge says it's their civic duty to watch as much densely-plotted television shows as possible, that's why the lowbrow stuff was outlawed.
At the firehouse, Homer asks the other firemen if they've actually watched the lowbrow content they burn, but he doesn't get a "yes". An alarm sounds; someone is watching lowbrow entertainment. The firemen break into Springfield Elementary, but Homer notices a glow from Groundskeeper Willie's shack. Homer gets a look at Funniest Home Videos and gets a good laugh at a goat biting a farmer in the crotch. Willie comes out of hiding, ejects the tape, stows it into Homer's uniform, and tells Homer to "take it, watch it, find us", tapping at the label sticker on the VHS tape. The firemen arrive to burn Willie's contraband and takes him away, and Homer hides the tape from sight.
Homer and Marge are having dinner with the Hibberts, Smithers, Mr. Largo and Lindsay Naegle. Everyone but Homer is talking about the season finale of a show that's too smart for Homer. Homer brings up the idea that TV can be dumb and fun, but he gets a lot of stares. After dinner, Homer watches FHV in secret, but Bart hears the sound of Homer's laughter and asks about what he was watching. Homer figures Bart might be the only one to understand, and he lets Bart watch a clip with a sneezing dog. Bart doesn't get it, what's the dog's backstory? What's the narrative? Homer turns it off, and makes Bart swear not to tell anyone.
The firemen arrive. Bart told anyway, having been won over by Robber Barons merch. Homer's boss is with the firemen, Burnmaster General Siegfried Blaze. Blaze explains that they set those fires so the only entertainment around must fully occupy the consciousness of the populace, as exemplified by Marge, Lisa and Bart paying no mind to what is happening around them. And with the people distracted by shows they can't just simply leave on the background while they look at their phone, or watch in any order due to lack of hard continuity, they can't notice just how dystopian their world is. Homer loves the idea of simpler, comfier, funnier, worse shows, and makes a break for it.
Homer: I! CHOOSE! CRAAAAP!
While on the run, he bumps into Barney, and tells him to swap clothes with him. A helicopter spots Barney in Homer's uniform, and shoots him with a laser, reducing him to ash. In the shadows, Homer spots the symbol on the tape label. The chestpiece of the Android's Dungeon android. Homer desperately demands to get in, and a cloaked figure lets him inside, and reveals a secret staircase using a Stewie Griffin bobblehead. The staircase leads Homer to a secret library of lowbrow videotapes. The cloaked figure reveals himself to be Krusty, guarding the entertainment of the old generation alongside Gil, Otto, Jasper and Mrs. Muntz. But Homer's dreams of watching low-stakes TV are crushed when a brigade of firemen break into the secret library and light it up. Homer, Krusty and the remaining guardians of the burning archive run, but Blaze lets them go. They have no means of watching their entertainment anymore. But oral storytelling kept the old lowbrow entertainment arrive, as the guardians regale eachother and their new numbers of stories of FHV, the Vanderpump Rules, and the antics of Dr. Sheldon Cooper, in the wilderness beyond Springfield.
Lisa is amazed by the stories, but she must leave, only to find she's in a black void. For listening to three of the illustrated man's stories, she has become another tattoo, her only company being the Sublime sun.
